diff --git a/src/CorePlugin.php b/src/CorePlugin.php
index 0187933..35777b5 100644
--- a/src/CorePlugin.php
+++ b/src/CorePlugin.php
@@ -102,9 +102,21 @@ class CorePlugin implements Plugin
             CustomerResource::class => CustomerErasureRelationsExtension::class,
         ]);
 
-        Product::macro('reviews', function (): HasMany {
-            /** @var Product $this */
-            return $this->hasMany(ProductReview::class);
+        // resolveRelationUsing(), not macro() — Illuminate\Database\Eloquent\
+        // Model does not use the Macroable trait in this Laravel version, so
+        // Product::macro(...)/Customer::macro(...)/$userModel::macro(...)
+        // silently fall through to Model::__callStatic(), which instantiates
+        // the model and tries to call the method as a real one, hitting
+        // newQuery()->getConnection() — this crashes every console command
+        // and every request, since CorePlugin::register() runs during
+        // provider registration, before the DB connection is configured
+        // ("Call to a member function connection() on null"). This bit us
+        // once already; resolveRelationUsing() is Eloquent's real, intended,
+        // connection-free extension point for exactly this (Order::
+        // resolveRelationUsing('shipments', ...) in ShippingServiceProvider
+        // already uses it correctly).
+        Product::resolveRelationUsing('reviews', function (Product $product): HasMany {
+            return $product->hasMany(ProductReview::class);
         });
 
         // Customer::erasureRequests()/exportRequests() and the User-model
@@ -115,24 +127,22 @@ class CorePlugin implements Plugin
         // Customer or a User (see docs/privacy.md "User-scope vs Customer-scope"),
         // so this is a MorphMany built by hand rather than a bare Eloquent
         // convention lookup.
-        Customer::macro('erasureRequests', function (): MorphMany {
-            /** @var Customer $this */
-            return $this->morphMany(DataErasureRequest::class, 'subject', 'subject_type', 'subject_id');
+        Customer::resolveRelationUsing('erasureRequests', function (Customer $customer): MorphMany {
+            return $customer->morphMany(DataErasureRequest::class, 'subject', 'subject_type', 'subject_id');
         });
 
-        Customer::macro('exportRequests', function (): MorphMany {
-            /** @var Customer $this */
-            return $this->morphMany(DataExportRequest::class, 'subject', 'subject_type', 'subject_id');
+        Customer::resolveRelationUsing('exportRequests', function (Customer $customer): MorphMany {
+            return $customer->morphMany(DataExportRequest::class, 'subject', 'subject_type', 'subject_id');
         });
 
         $userModel = config('auth.providers.users.model');
 
-        $userModel::macro('erasureRequests', function (): MorphMany {
-            return $this->morphMany(DataErasureRequest::class, 'subject', 'subject_type', 'subject_id');
+        $userModel::resolveRelationUsing('erasureRequests', function ($user): MorphMany {
+            return $user->morphMany(DataErasureRequest::class, 'subject', 'subject_type', 'subject_id');
         });
 
-        $userModel::macro('exportRequests', function (): MorphMany {
-            return $this->morphMany(DataExportRequest::class, 'subject', 'subject_type', 'subject_id');
+        $userModel::resolveRelationUsing('exportRequests', function ($user): MorphMany {
+            return $user->morphMany(DataExportRequest::class, 'subject', 'subject_type', 'subject_id');
         });
 
         LunarStaff::addActivitylogExcept([